If you know me but at all....

Lets just get to the point- I'm awkward, and I hate it, but I can't change it.

Setting the scene.... Christmas Eve night, at Derek's grandma, hanging out with all (and I mean all) of his family.  The other day Derek and I were discussing our Christmas plans and he was telling me all about going to his grandma's for Christmas Eve dinner.  Then he brought up something that instantly made me worry.  "Santa comes every year, and EVERYONE has to sit on his lap, its tradition."  "Uh, wait what? No way, not happening.  That is way too much attention on me at one time, uh-uh I'm not doing that."  "You have to ask him what you want for Christmas, so what do you want?"  Now me being the brat that everyone knows I am said... "What do I want? What do I want?  Hmm, ooh wait, I've wanted an engagement ring forever now, so I'll ask for that :) :)"  Derek looked at me and laughed as if he knew there was no way in heck I would ever say that especially in front of his family.  Alright, so cutting to the chase...

Christmas Eve.  My name got called to go sit on Santa's lap but luckily I had planned it so that I would be in the bathroom and hopefully get out of it all together.  Unfortunately I didn't get out of it, I had to sit on his lap.  As I'm walking up to his lap I was really nervous, I mean really nervous, yuck, I wanted to puke.  I sat down, looked at Derek and as I was being asked, "What would you like for Christmas young lady?" I said, "I would like... (then my voice got VERY shaky.  So shaky that no one could really tell what I said) an... eng-age-em-ment ring..." (just try to picture that coming out of my mouth, I felt like I was in 7th grade giving my impromptu speech all over again, oh the pain.)  I have no dang clue what Santa said after that all I know is I took my gift and ran back to Derek.  Everyone was laughing and I kept saying, "Wow that was way too much unwanted attention on me, Derek... Derek... I think I'm going to cry, I'm so embarrassed."  HAHA, oh heck.  His family kept saying, "Ash why are you shaking so bad?"  I was all, "Did you see what I just did?!?"  I can not handle being embarrassed, it feels like I got the wind knocked out of me.

We got to my moms later that night and I told her the whole story.  She looked at me and said, "What the?  My daughter said that?  There is no way... I can't believe that.  I bet you were so red and sweaty ahahahaha."  She thought it was so funny... as I hope all of you did too.  For the peeps that know me very well I'm sure you can picture this exactly how it was.  So, if anyone has any tips on how to not be awkward and embarrassed, I'm ALL ears.  I'll post pictures later and what else happened on Christmas, but for now I'm going to go back to my 'Box of Shame'.